So this week I read a blog post about the whole Ciara #LevelUp thing. (Steps on soapbox) Mic Check… Mic CHECK… First of all, I don’t need nobody to tell me to ‘level up.’ I definitely don’t need a man who doesn’t know me or my struggle that I have a ‘girlfriend spirit.’ I’m not going to subscribe to this sexist conversation about how it’s my fault that I don’t have a husband. No, it’s not my fault that I don’t have a husband. Perhaps, I don’t have a husband because I’m well-educated, and I don’t take no mess. Perhaps, I don’t have a husband because my last several attempts at relationships were with men who wanted mothers and not partners. Perhaps, I’m not in a relationship because the world is mine for the taking and I don’t want to be slowed down by someone who thinks that because I am a woman I am supposed to be at home tending to children and keeping a clean home. Perhaps, the person I’m supposed to spend my life with is across the world in a small village turning up to drums and homemade harmonicas, but I’m in America being told that it’s my fault we aren’t together.
In my family I am a known feminist, writing essays about the oppressive nature of the ideals of marriage. I ruffle feathers about traditional roles that women have and the roles that men should be willing to take. I’m vocal about the life of a single woman because that’s my area of expertise. That means I don’t go around telling grown married men how to handle their lives and I expect the same from them. Simple as that.